So I'm 24.
And I am supposed to feel this sort of renewal within me making this transition from 23 to 24. I don't really feel any different. I'm feeling very anxious, very repressed, very oppressed, like a caged bird that was never supposed to be trapped in the first place. And if I was given my freedom, would I even know what to do with it? If the door was open, would I still remain in the cage.
So I'm 24.
And between foolishness and maturity. I have watched those my age marry, divorce, have children, graduate college, get jobs, travel. I feel like the runner who didn't hear the gun go off at the start of the race. I know everyone has their own pace, their own drum that they march to. I am feeling in a rut. I want to graduate but I'm unsure of the life that waits for me after that diploma is placed in my hand. I have seen how the real world has changed my friends. 9 to 5s are not for me and people scoff at my dreams of doing something that will only afford happiness and contentment in my life. Why should I be practical at the expense of my dreams. At what point does the vicious cycle end?
So I'm 24.
And single. Experience is limited. Relationships are alluring? Am I ready for a relationship? I am a selfish person to an extent. I have never had to share. It has always been me. I want someone to talk to on the deepest level, no exteriors, only baring my innermost workings. I want someone who will trust me enough to do the same.
So I'm 24.
And patience is wearing thin. I want something of my own. Something that sets me apart from others. Something that I can be proud of. I'm tired of being pigeon-holed, stereotyped, generalized, etc. I am Bryce Lee Wynn and I want everyone to see that. I am 3-dimensional. I am highly-intelligent though drastically flawed. Love me or hate me. I am not perfect nor do I strive to be. I want to be able to say what I feel and not be misunderstood anymore.
So I'm 24.
And I should be happy. I think I am happy. I think I could be happier. In some ways I fear happiness.
So I'm 24.
And I am supposed to feel this sort of renewal within me making this transition from 23 to 24. I don't really feel any different. I'm feeling very anxious, very repressed, very oppressed, like a caged bird that was never supposed to be trapped in the first place. And if I was given my freedom, would I even know what to do with it? If the door was open, would I still remain in the cage.
So I'm 24.
And between foolishness and maturity. I have watched those my age marry, divorce, have children, graduate college, get jobs, travel. I feel like the runner who didn't hear the gun go off at the start of the race. I know everyone has their own pace, their own drum that they march to. I am feeling in a rut. I want to graduate but I'm unsure of the life that waits for me after that diploma is placed in my hand. I have seen how the real world has changed my friends. 9 to 5s are not for me and people scoff at my dreams of doing something that will only afford happiness and contentment in my life. Why should I be practical at the expense of my dreams. At what point does the vicious cycle end?
So I'm 24.
And single. Experience is limited. Relationships are alluring? Am I ready for a relationship? I am a selfish person to an extent. I have never had to share. It has always been me. I want someone to talk to on the deepest level, no exteriors, only baring my innermost workings. I want someone who will trust me enough to do the same.
So I'm 24.
And patience is wearing thin. I want something of my own. Something that sets me apart from others. Something that I can be proud of. I'm tired of being pigeon-holed, stereotyped, generalized, etc. I am Bryce Lee Wynn and I want everyone to see that. I am 3-dimensional. I am highly-intelligent though drastically flawed. Love me or hate me. I am not perfect nor do I strive to be. I want to be able to say what I feel and not be misunderstood anymore.
So I'm 24.
And I should be happy. I think I am happy. I think I could be happier. In some ways I fear happiness.
So I'm 24.
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