It's been a great weekend and week. I feel that I got a lot accomplished. I feel that I am further moving into this new phase of adulthood and I must say that I am enjoying every minute of it. I started at Chattanooga School for the Arts & Sciences (CSAS) last Friday and I was blown away by both the students and the faculty's reception of me. Now when I was a peer counselor at Central High School - my Alma-Mater - I felt like a stranger in my own land so to speak. The guidance counselor, Dr. Smith, at CSAS really went out of her way to make sure that I felt at home. She took me around to all the senior homerooms and allowed me to introduce myself to the students and they were all very welcoming. It was such a shocker. My cousin Olivia goes to CSAS and I'm a bit envious of her. The school is a place that I feel all parents should enroll their children.
In Andrew Najberg's class today, we workshopped me and Cliff's two-page descriptions of a town or place's origin. I created this fictional town of Minor Springs that my new story is going to be set in. Everyone seemed to like the descriptions, including the part where one of the women in the town murders her husband and nails him to the tree in their front yard. I really appreciated the feedback from the class and Andrew. Cliff's two-pager was about the origin of Bowser's castle in the Super Mario universe. I thought it was clever and an interesting subject to write on. Andrew compared me and Cliff's stories saying that they were on completely opposite ends of a spectrum. I tend to go for the ultra-realistic while Cliff goes for a fantasy/surrealistic approach.
I've been listening to a lot of music lately and I've become infatuated, recently, with this Jazmine Sullivan single called Lions, Tigers & Bears. It's a beautiful song set against a sea of lilting strings. Jazmine laments about the fact that she doesn't have the mortal fears than many men and women have such as being afraid of lions, tigers, and bears but she does fear falling in love and the possible rejections that could come with that. I'm feeling a lot like that. I would love to be in a relationship. I would love to have that one person that I could just sit back with at the end of the day and just unload all of my issues, my insecurities, and my thoughts on and vice-versa. But in the end I'm afraid to take that step. Taking that step is the equivalent of possibly being mauled by a lion, a tiger, or a bear. I have issues with trust. I've been wronged and hurt before and the walls around me keep getting thicker. But isn't that what love is about? Risk taking? Knowing that you can be wronged or hurt?
Speaking of taking risks, I'm somewhat looking forward to moving on after graduation. I'm feeling suffocated. Not at home. I love living at home with my mom and having access to my family. I love that feeling. I feel crowded on campus. I feel insecure on campus, especially in the classroom. I second-guess myself. I feel that i bring a lot to the table but a lot of times I think people think that I'm not as smart as I am therefore they right me off as not being as informed or knowledgeable on the tasks at hand. I just think I'm getting to that point where I need to try something new. I need something that is my own. That's what I like about working at CSAS. It's me alone and I don't have to share this with anyone else. There's no competition so there's honestly no insecurities. This job really came at the best time in my life. It gives me a chance to get out the Financial Aid office and off campus to go help others. I love helping others and I was telling Jeremiah today that maybe I would like to work in a high school environment, in what capacity I do not know.
In Andrew Najberg's class today, we workshopped me and Cliff's two-page descriptions of a town or place's origin. I created this fictional town of Minor Springs that my new story is going to be set in. Everyone seemed to like the descriptions, including the part where one of the women in the town murders her husband and nails him to the tree in their front yard. I really appreciated the feedback from the class and Andrew. Cliff's two-pager was about the origin of Bowser's castle in the Super Mario universe. I thought it was clever and an interesting subject to write on. Andrew compared me and Cliff's stories saying that they were on completely opposite ends of a spectrum. I tend to go for the ultra-realistic while Cliff goes for a fantasy/surrealistic approach.
I've been listening to a lot of music lately and I've become infatuated, recently, with this Jazmine Sullivan single called Lions, Tigers & Bears. It's a beautiful song set against a sea of lilting strings. Jazmine laments about the fact that she doesn't have the mortal fears than many men and women have such as being afraid of lions, tigers, and bears but she does fear falling in love and the possible rejections that could come with that. I'm feeling a lot like that. I would love to be in a relationship. I would love to have that one person that I could just sit back with at the end of the day and just unload all of my issues, my insecurities, and my thoughts on and vice-versa. But in the end I'm afraid to take that step. Taking that step is the equivalent of possibly being mauled by a lion, a tiger, or a bear. I have issues with trust. I've been wronged and hurt before and the walls around me keep getting thicker. But isn't that what love is about? Risk taking? Knowing that you can be wronged or hurt?
Speaking of taking risks, I'm somewhat looking forward to moving on after graduation. I'm feeling suffocated. Not at home. I love living at home with my mom and having access to my family. I love that feeling. I feel crowded on campus. I feel insecure on campus, especially in the classroom. I second-guess myself. I feel that i bring a lot to the table but a lot of times I think people think that I'm not as smart as I am therefore they right me off as not being as informed or knowledgeable on the tasks at hand. I just think I'm getting to that point where I need to try something new. I need something that is my own. That's what I like about working at CSAS. It's me alone and I don't have to share this with anyone else. There's no competition so there's honestly no insecurities. This job really came at the best time in my life. It gives me a chance to get out the Financial Aid office and off campus to go help others. I love helping others and I was telling Jeremiah today that maybe I would like to work in a high school environment, in what capacity I do not know.
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